miserable

 Something nasty snuck into our household this last week and we've been trapped inside trying to tough it out.  Matt got an awful coughing/fever bug first and passed it quickly to Beckham.  They were so miserable.  Kaden and I stayed strong for days and I thought we might have dodged a bullet.  No such luck. I don't know why I thought I wouldn't get it, there is no way around kissing on Beckham.  It's been 5 days and I am finally feeling somewhat human again.  Kaden felt bad for about a day and hardly even slowed down.  Matt is nearly better, but poor Beckham seems like he hasn't improved much at all.  He's still getting a fever every day and looks so droopy and sad.  He will hardly eat anything.

 It really breaks my heart.  He coughs and gets so upset. His eyes water and his voice is scratchy.  We went to the park the other day and he just shuffled around and then insisted on being held.  Today I was changing all of our sheets and he just followed me around from room to room with his blanket.  He would lay on the floor and stay there until I moved to another room.  I hate feeling so helpless. It's especially sad because he doesn't understand why he feels so awful.  I don't understand why it always takes so much longer for him to get over illness.  I have spent hours and hours just holding him and letting him rest his little body cozied up to mine.  I wish there was more I could do to make him feel better.  I've said it a million times, but I am really not sure I am cut out for this mothering business.  It just yanks at my heart strings way too much. 

 It's so true that you really feel so much more grateful for health when you've felt bad for even a short time.  I am excited for us all to feel better and be back to our healthy, happy selves.